Archive for the ‘Fashion’ Category

Dear Sec. Clinton,

As someone who is immensely proud that you – a strong, smart, kick-ass woman – are at the helm of one of the most important federal executive departments in our country, I absolutely hate it when people criticize your hair or wardrobe. It really irks me, because no one criticizes Robert Gates’ haircut or Eric Holder’s suits. People should not get away with that foolishness just because you are a woman. The Secretary of State has more important things to worry about than accessorizing, people! Dang!

But – and don’t get me wrong, everything I just said is true – I have to ask you, Sec. Clinton, what in the name of holy hell is this?!?

The only time my head looks like this is first thing in the morning when I’m only halfway done with the flatiron!

Sec. Clinton, I implore you – please do not ever attend a UN meeting looking like this. You represent the United States of America! Sheesh! Even Condi knew better than that!

Yours truly,



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I know the Emmys are no Oscars. Not even close. But I love a red carpet event. So let’s deconstruct, shall we?

The Good

To my dismay, this is a thin category this year. There was a lot of fug happening on that red carpet, let me tell ya! But a few ladies stood out beautifully. Here are my favorites.

Tina Fey

My favorite look of the night! Tina Fey killed it!! She worked this dress like the rent was due last Thursday!! GORGEOUS!! She usually likes black, but she ventured out a bit with this amazing overlay print. And the dress fits like she was born in it. I think I jumped up and down and squealed a little when she walked out, because she was that fabulous!

Claire Danes

It is really, really hard for me to say something nice about some trick who once stole a pregnant woman’s man. But I give credit where it is due: Claire’s dress was a close, close second to Tina’s as my favorite of the night.

Jayma Mays

OK, ladies – take note. THIS is how you do a frilly detail right! Jayma looked GORGEOUS! The gown fit her perfectly, the navy color is beautiful, the hair and makeup are flawless and don’t compete with the dress. This is glamour done right!

Much, much more after the jump =>


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Sorry Rihanna

Rihanna, I know you probably thought you were being innovative when you performed in this light-up gown:

I know you may be a bit young to remember this, though, but a fab fashionista already beat you to this look. Years ago. Her name is Jane. Check it at about 00:39:

Better luck next time, RiRi!!



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Oh, I wait 365 days each year for this night! It is my Super Bowl!!

But I have to say, this year, I was disappointed. I LOVED so many dresses last year!!! This year left me underwhelmed. But there were some dresses that impressed me, some that left me wanting more, some that left me wanting much less, and some that left me wanting to some Pepto. So let’s get to it.

Category 1: The ‘YES!!’

Vera Farmiga. My. Favorite. Dress. Of. The. NIIIIIGHT!! LOVED this look on her – the color, the drama, the way she walked in it – everything!! This is the kind of glamour the Oscars are about!

Now, I took a look at the interwebs, and I see already that she has made some worst dressed lists. So perhaps this is a controversial choice. I don’t care. It played on TV way better than it does in pictures (and I still love it in pictures), she took my breath away and I’m sticking with my choice.

Sandra Bullock. Photos doesn’t do it the justice that television did. I wish I could have seen it in person because I thought everything about it was stunning – the sparkle, the color, the subtle asymmetry – everything. And during the show – she sat in the front row – in every wide shot of the audience, she just shimmered like a star. Her makeup and hair were also perfect for the look. Gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous! Just stunning! Nice job for your first Oscar win, girl!

Cameron Diaz: Now, let me tell y’all – it’s feels so strange to compliment Cameron Diaz on a red carpet look because I usually think she looks like an unkempt mess. I thought that was just her shtick! I never expected her to do old school glam – right down to the hair and makeup! She was stunning! Well played, Miss D!

Kate Winslet: Wow, lots of silver tonight. I spot a trend! Ok, this didn’t blow my socks off, but I thought she was beautiful. A great dress for a gorgeous, non-nominee. This is a woman who knows what she looks good in, and nails it (almost) every time. I love her.

Kristen Stewart: (*Sound of me getting off the ground…*) WOW! I have never seen her look like anything more than an unwashed stoner rat someone forced to wear a dress. But she cleaned up nicely for the big show! I usually hate black dresses, but she demonstrates how black can be done glamorously! A very surprising laurel to you, girl!

Queen Latifah: You know, I would never in a million years have picked this dress color, dress cut, sparkly trim, hair – none of it. But on Dana, it looks beautiful. Because she’s the Queen and she knows herself. Well done.

Susan Geston: Ok, I didn’t really love her dress or anything – it was fine, but –  I think she is adorable and I was just so proud of Jeff Bridges for not bringing some 17-year-old to the Oscars that I had to put their picture here. Good for you!!

Category 2: The “Meh…”

Some people just seemed like they didn’t try hard enough. Too many people in this category.  This is the OSCARS, people! Not the time to hold back!! Make an effort. Sheesh!

Mo’Nique. This was especially disappointing because she had one of my FAVORITE dresses at the Golden Globes. I get it – she wore a blue dress with a white flower in her hair because Hattie McDaniel wore a blue dress and white flower when she won her Oscar. I get the symbolism. I’m judging simply on the fashion. And this failed make a slash with me. It’s fine. It’s just not amazing.

Tina Fey: On first glance, I liked this dress. But I think that was just my adoration for Tina Fey showing through, because on second look, I thought: ‘Oh, wait. No.’ You can do better, T. I do not want to go there.

Meryl Streep. You know, I have to give Meryl a bit of a pass, because when you’ve been nominated 16 times, you have the right to show up in a bathrobe if you want. But Meryl shouldn’t have taken that sentiment literally. I really love the shoulders, and even the front plunge. But the bottom? Meh at best.

Gabby Sidibe: Gabby – I’ve been seeing you look ADORABLE lately! And I love your personality. You were SO funny on the red carpet! And when you cried during Oprah’s introduction of you, I cried too. But this silver appliqué on this dress looks very Filene’s Basement. You stylist could have done better. She or he has before, because you have really been looking fabulous these past weeks. Still adore you, Though!

Anna Kendrick: I know this is your first Oscars red carpet walk, but a rule of thumb: if you are younger than 60, cute, and – oh, I don’t know – NOMINATED FOR AN OSCAR, leave the flesh tones alone, ok? Color is your friend.

Category 3: The “NO!!”

What makes me mad about this category is that it is filled with people who should have known better!

Demi Moore: When I saw her, the first thing that popped into my mind is that she looks like she has some strange, horrible skin-peeling disease.

Jennifer Lopez. Ok, to borrow a phrase from the incomparable Fug Girls, this was a perfect example of ‘Scroll Down Fug.’

When the camera shot her from the waist up – GORGEOUS. The top of the dress, her hair, her makeup – all stunning. If the bottom of the dress were like to top, she would have been my favorite of the night.

But then we go below the waist…

And it looked like her hip threw up a wedding cake. Bad. Just bad….

Carey Mulligan: Dear actresses, step away from the mullet dresses.

Penelope Cruz: Sigourney: “Penelope, guurrrllll, why did you let the bottom of your dress get caught up in the vacuum cleaner like that? On Ocsar night! And how did your hair get caught too?? I don’t understand…”

Category 4: The “Oh, HELL Naw!!”

For this category, in the words of Andre Leon Talley: “It is a famine of beauty, honey. A fa-mine of beau-tee!”

Sarah Jessica Parker: OMG, Carrie!! What happened to you?!?! How can a 57 pound woman look frumpy? This looks like my laundry bag with a Christmas tinsel bow thrown on top. At the very least, your stylist should have made sure the crease was steamed out of the front. And why didn’t you comb your hair?? Ugh!

Mariah Carey: “I had a vision of fug….”

Zoe Saldana: Wait, I have a great design idea: Top third, wedding gown; middle third; prom dress from 1972; bottom third, cotton candy!! Oh, sorry – I momentarily took a trip into Bizarro Fug Alien World! Come on, girl! You are UHURA! This makes sense in no universe! Ugh!!!

Charlize Theron: It looks like her breasts were victims of “When 1960s Corsages Attack!!.”


Barbra Streisand. I don’t have a picture here, but for some inexplicable reason Babs came dressed as Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

Miley Cyrus: Miley, you are a teenager. Not a retiree from the Best Little Whorehouse In Texas. Oh, and another question: Why were you there?

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Open letter to Britney Spears

Dear Britney,

Bras are our friends.



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So in the last few weeks I have been hard at work planning for my first fashion show, which will happen in the spring of 2010. And since I’ve spent just as much time thinking of soundtrack for the show as I have spent sketching dresses and choosing fabric, the process totally lends itself to a new playlist.

I have a short list of songs that I am considering for the actual show, and none of those are listed below because I want it all to be a big surprise! But these are songs that certainly inspire me in the pieces that I making for the show.

City of Blinding Lights, U2. The fact that I was inspired heavily from my trip to Paris last year, and the lyrics “I’ve seen you walk unafraid, I’ve seen you in the clothes you made” and “Oh, you look so beautiful tonight!” keeps this song in heavy rotation in the iPod. Plus this song was AWESOME when I saw U2 live a few months back.

Fashion, Lady GaGa. I fought it. I really did. But I couldn’t help it. I love the Gaga. I really, really love her. And this song channels my inner runway diva.

My Jamaican Guy, Grace Jones. I LOVE Grace! OMG, LOOOOOOOVE her! She is as beautiful and badass and fierce as they come. Really. I want an ounce of her fierceness. And this is my favorite Grace track. I has that nice island groove that inspires my resort wear pieces. Plus, without this song, we wouldn’t have LL Cool J’s Doin’ It.

Human, The Killers. I like that this song sounds simultaneously retro and futuristic. I find myself thinking of the past and the future at the same time for the pieces I’m working on, so it’s very fitting.

Tonight is What it Means to Be Young, Ellen Aim & The Attackers (Fire Inc., in real life). I mentioned that I was going to make the dress Ellen Aim wore when she sang this song in Streets of Fire. But instead, I’m reinterpreting the dress and putting it in the show. I listen to this track when I work on it, though!

Express Yourself, Charles Wright and the Watts 103rd Street Rhythm Band (Mocean Worker Mix). I first heard this remix of this song in the film Mr. & Mrs. Smith, and it’s been a staple in my iPod ever since. It’s really a perfect runway song.

Fashion, David Bowie. You know I luvs me some Bowie, and this video is iconic.

Beautiful, Moby. I love this song. Reminds me not to take this fashion stuff too seriously.

Theme From Mahogany (Do You Know Where You’re Going To?), Diana Ross. I have watched this movie about 23 times since I started this fashion design venture earlier this year. At least. Really. It inspires me so much. And this song is just as inspirational – I think I learned it when I was 2,  so that’s a lot of years of inspiration! I love this fan-made music video. It’s like a 3-minute version of the whole movie. Well done.

You Make Me Feel (Mighty Real), Sylvester. Woooooo! You was FIERCE, gurrrrl! Sylvester left us much, much too soon, depriving the world of his fierce fabulousness. But this song lives on. Makes me wanna make a sequined caftan with a matching turban and wear them with an arm full of bangles and a fan! Fierce!

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Open letter to Rihanna

Dear Ri Ri,

How you doin’ girl? Hope you’re hanging in there. I still haven’t watched your interview with Diane Sawyer. It’s on my DVR. It’s been a busy week. I’ll get to it. But I digress…

I normally love your edgy fashion style. You are young, you’re gorgeous, so I say, why not! Go nuts!

But, sweetie, when you are trying to do origami-inspired drama in an evening gown, you may want to examine how the grown folks do it first. I give you Marisa:


But whatever you do, please don’t ever, EVER, do this again:


No, girl. No. Just, just – no! It looks like you pulled the paper out of a jammed printer and stapled it to yourself!

Better luck next time! Until then, Ciao Bella. Ella. Ella. Eh. Eh. Eh.



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